Bittersweet

Tonight, for absolutely no reason at all, I was reminded one of the most bittersweet memories I think I will ever have in this lifetime.

In 2006, my Aunt Janet (my mom's sister) died of colon cancer.  She battled the disease for years, but eventually could not fight any more and the Lord called her home.  My Aunt Janet lived in Oregon, and I will always remember and be moved by the sacrifice my mother made in absolute love for her sister by leaving her own family in Kansas City and spending my aunt's last weeks with her.

At one point in my mom's time in Oregon, when we had accepted that the end was inevitable and close, my aunt requested that I sing at her funeral.  She specifically wanted "The Lord's Prayer."  I knew I couldn't oblige this request for two reasons:  1.  There was no way in the world I would ever make it through singing any song at her funeral, much less "The Lord's Prayer".    2.  I probably wouldn't be able to get to Oregon last minute for the funeral.

So I recorded it.  With the help of some friends, we spent an afternoon working on the recording, and I emailed it to my mom.

But here's the memory that shocked me with the tears this evening:

I can vividly remember lying in my bed at my parents' house one night with my cell phone resting between the pillow and my ear.  My mom was playing my recording for my aunt for the first time and we were all listening to it together, hundreds of miles apart.  I remember hearing my recorded voice playing, with me in my bed and Aunt Janet in hers, incredibly blessed that I was able to give her this small gift - this token of my love for her - while tears fell down my cheeks and soaked my pillow.   


To this day, that memory instantaneously brings rivers of bittersweet tears.